Robin Hood 108: "Tattoo? What Tattoo?"

In which Robin spends a lot of time tied to a tree, and discovers the identity of a would-be royal assassin.

Robin awakes from yet another nightmare about his time in the Holy Land. This time the night a saracen assassin infiltrated the camp, stabbed him and left him for dead and went to kill the King. Robin managed to foil the attempt and in so doing sliced through a tattoo on the assassin's arm, leaving a distinct scar.

It so happens it's the King's birthday, and Much finds it galling that Gisbourne is throwing a feast in Locksley Manor! At said party he also announces to all that Marian has accepted to be his wife on the King's return.

Spoilers below!

But Robin, always ready for mischief, crashes the party with the gang to steal the nobles' valuables (including Marian's engagement ring from Guy). Fighting with Guy he cuts through his tunic and a tattoo with a distinctive scar is revealed: the King's would-be assassin wasn't a saracen, but Guy!

Tell-tale ink!

Guy chases after them into Sherwood, Robin draws him into a fight and they both end up evenly match and exhausted until the others arrive. They end up fighting several times, sparring with swords, fists and words...

"Robin: Make no mistake, this ends here. Traitor.

Guy: You thought you would come back from the Holy Land all covered in glory, Well guess what! Nobody cares! They can't even point o the Holy Land on a map. So what was it all for?"

Gisbourne taunts him about his useless battle in the Holy Land, he justifies his actions as their King fights another's wars, the Pope's, not England's. He's not worthy of being their king if he abandons his people to go off to fight in a foreign country. And he taunts him about living in his house and marrying Marian, as he realizes she's the reason Robin stayed in Nottinghamshire instead of going in search of friends elsewhere...

Robin wants to torture Guy for information on his accomplices, then kill him. But he's been preaching no killing and bloodshed since he returned (unless strictly necessary), and the others don't understand why he would go against his beliefs all of the sudden. They weren't in Acre and can't understand this visceral hatred.

Unfortunately Djaq has been captured in Locksley by the Sheriff's men and the Sheriff wants her to be his alchemist once he discovers a liquid she has that can burn through solid metal (an acid she uses for an earlier escape attempt). She tries to escape, the gang (minus Robin, tied up so he won't kill Gisbourne) try to rescue her but she ends up rescuing them before being captured again... In other words an epic fail all around, so the only option left is a prisoner exchange.

"Will: Are you alright? 

Djaq: Are you alright? 

Allan: I thought we were saving you! 

Djaq: Now I'm saving you. 

Allan: [laughing] You're a woman. We're men. 

Djaq: Irritating, isn't it?"

(Turns out both Will and Allan have a thing for Djaq which is why they were so desperate to get to Nottingham to rescue her 💕)

It takes bringing Marian in to try to talk some sense in him. She tries to convince him to follow the law, a trial etc. But Robin says there is no law until the King returns. The Sheriff is the law, Gisbourne is his man... so basically they proceed without him, with Marian serving as the intermediary to get the Sheriff to agree to the exchange.

In the end of course Robin comes round, does the right thing, and saves their bacon. Djaq is touched he would sacrifice Guy for her.

Unfortunately he doesn't even have the proof against Guy anymore (tattoo), because while confronting the Sheriff, he poured Djaq's acid over it and burnt it away. But now Robin knows there is a bigger conspiracy here, and he won't stop until he gets to the bottom of it. He is the King's man through and through.

Painful medieval tattoo removal process...

Straight from Sherwood (or not!)

• I don't remember a plot to kill King Richard, does anyone?
• Or Sir Guy of Gisbourne being taken prisoner by the outlaws? I need to refresh my memories on the classic tales...

Note: The notes for this post were taken when I started the series rewatch last summer, but got carried away with the episodes and never stopped and looked back to finish polishing the posts and adding photos, so posting them now. 😅